Wednesday, February 20, 2013

Hoarsemeat...a song inspired by Shetland ponies


(I understand that in parts of Holland and Belgium, you used to see little rural houses, each with a tethered Shetland pony on the lawn. Just as some people keep a pig or chickens, fattening them up for the oven or pot, so it was the habit to fatten up your Sheltie for - what must have been a very large - Christmas dinner). And they must have had enormous ovens...

A link to a rough recording is at the end of the lyrics...

I feel like a shetland Pony in the rain and snow
I feel like a Shetland pony with no place to go
We love Shetland ponies they are always in demand
In petting zoos and parks and pies, in burgers and in cans

I'm a horse
I'm a horse
I'm a hoarse horse, a very hoarse horse indeed
I'm a horse
I'm a horse of course
I'm a hoarse horse a very hoarse horse indeed

What use is a shetland Pony if it cannot neigh?
If I was a Shetland Pony I'd have lots to say
In Belgium or Romania they'd kill me for my meat
If I could speak I'd ask them if they found it nice and sweet


If I was a Shetland Pony I'd be short and fat
I would not let anybody bother me for that
In a beef lasagne you might find a piece of me
At least I can assure you that you won't get BSE


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